Can your Best Friend be your Personal Assistant?

Recently, I’ve been struggling with having my closest friend as my personal assistant. This pretty much includes, handling my email accounts, controlling my media exposure at social events and anything you could imagine to help further my progression as a public adult figure. Anyone would think, it’s great to have someone around who understands my random freak-outs from daily pressures and is also someone I’m very comfortable venting to, who also gets the job done. Whoah.

However, the frustration that roots and festers comes from expecting my assistant to cross every “t” and dot every “i” when it comes to my brand and my business. When accompanying me to a social event, my personal assistant should be all about networking for me, and less involved in the social chaos itself. That is not always the case when you invite a close friend into your professional life. You run the risk of him or her “slipping up” often, due to how close you two are; plus the level of comfortability to do so, because you’re besties.

It’s exhausting to play the role of someone who delegates and a girlfriend. So, any failure to perform gets much lighter treatment than an outsider who would most likely get a very long discussion or scolding all together. The fact that I allowed close friendship to intertwine with business was a risk in itself.

There are times I want to simply say “No More! You’re Fired!”, but what stops me every time is our deeply rooted bond. Overall, it’s not good for business. It feels good to be able  to say “That was fucked up. Don’t do that again.” with his or her response being, “All right. We good?” and everyone moves on. Down the road, it can be horrible because it leads to repeat offenses, growing concerns, and eventually more stress that leads to a lack of focus (which is imperative for being “present” and “on” in social settings).

I’d rather keep the friendship I have with someone than ruin it entirely by internalizing frustration, when business is not handled the way I need it to be: fluently, obsessively, and punctually, like I do. If no one warned you already, no one will ever be as passionate about your life goals as you are, yourself. No one will wake up as driven as you do about seeing your dreams become reality and taking every necessary step to make that happen, daily.

So, I’ll be searching for someone with the right skills, dedication and passion to be by my side. I’ve been watching the reality television show on Style Network called “Kimora: Life in the Fab Lane”: a show about Kimora Lee Simmons and how she runs her businesses, household, and employees with a no-nonsense attitude. It’s helped me regain the confidence to be a strong, passionate businesswoman who adores what she’s built and I plan to expand that greatness every day.

I have extreme goals of excellency, a burning desire to help women and men across the globe, and the confidence to get out there and shine. So, when I think about someone hired as my “right hand” I think about someone who sees the utmost greatness in me, who’s willing to use his or her skills to further that same goal. Not just when it seems convenient. Until I find that special individual, my eyes are open, my ears are receptive, and my mind is alert with openness.



  1. Benjamin Mathew · October 25, 2017

    do you, in a way feel trapped because of this?


  2. Jimmy · October 29, 2017

    Dear Anya, I totally get the need for professionalism in your assistant on your part. But you also have to realize that you hired her because she was good at things AND because she is your good friend and could mix the two(and so could she). I worry that you watch a reality show and think any of it is actual reality- it is not what you actually see, but things that make someone want watch more with executives and consultants.
    Anyway, you could keep your assistant, but you would need to sit down with her and actually write out and go over an actual job description and job responsibilities. Establish what is work and what if friend social life. That way you get what you want in a friend and what you want in an assistant, and she does too! If it doesn’t work, then you can move on. Also, think about her in your current situation, she may be confused too. When is work and when is my best friend just taking me to a party or event? It has to be just as hard for her to balance social life and work with you. I hope it all works out because I can’t see anything better than growing and doing great things with your best friend in business and life. Just my opinion though. ~Much Love, Jimmy


  3. michaeljlando · November 26, 2017

    I’m not sure it is possible; I’m sure there are some exceptions to this but accountability is key to running a successful business. Having worked in the corporate world for a while, I realized early on, I had to separate my friends from business simply for the reasons you stated — it’s hard to hold them accountable in the way you should. The moment I had to hold my closest friend accountable for her attendance, she immediately tried to use the personal details of her life that only I was privy too, as leverage to get out of the situation. When I refused to allow that to be an excuse, it damaged the friendship permanently as she felt I should have been more understanding. While it was the right thing to do as a leader, I still regret my initial decision to have such a close friend work for me.

    One of the things I’ve always loved about you as a star is how responsive you are to your fans. I recently entered a promo of yours and never received the item. Oh well, that’s life. Reading this makes me feel better to know you’re continuing to work hard to protect your brand, correct anything that impacts your business, and maintain the bond you have with your friends. Separating the two will give you peace of mind with the operations of your business and your relationships.

    P.S. Keep up the amazing work with your blog. It is one of my favorite reads on the internet — thoughtful and inspiring.


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